Mother's Day Reflections

Today, I honor my Mother. She is a wonderful woman, who has carried our lineage into this era well. She has redefined the role of Mother in such a radical way. It must have been challenging for her to parent in such a different way than her Mother did and her sister chose. My Mother made an evolutionary sharp right turn, if you will, assisting our family of origin into more evolved and healthy realms, as had not been seen in her lifetime certainly in her direct lineage. Where did she learn this? How was she even motivated to change the model? Her own suffering from her family of origin was the inspiration, that and her drive to improve. We are blessed by her choices and we all benefit from them. Thank you Mom. I would not be who I am without you, and the many blessings of my family of origin.

I would not be who I am today without the love of the amazing man I married. Karl takes every opportunity to honor me as his wife and the mother of our children. It makes life joyful! Even mundane tasks become heart centered, when you are doing them for someone who loves you, flirts with you, and honors you every day (even after twenty three plus years). The most extravagant gift my husband ever gave me (my current wedding ring) he gave me for Mother's Day years ago. He said Mother's Day was the perfect day to give this to me, since being parents together has taken our love and our life to levels he never dreamed possible. He doesn't ever need to get me another gift for Mother's Day. That day was so deeply touching, the effects will last a lifetime. Indeed financially we are being more careful these days, as so many are. I got two cards with beautiful sentiments from Karl, which filled my heart more than any gift ever could.

I would not be the mother I am today without the two amazing children we have together. They are now adults, and we couldn't be more proud, impressed, amazed and in awe of who they are and how they navigate in this world. They both make excellent real world decisions on a regular basis. They have excelled at whatever they put their hearts and minds to. They are kind, compassionate and loving people.

I look at our children, and that is the greatest Mother's Day gift of all. I have had the honor of watching them grow into the adults they are today. As I sit here tonight everyone has gone to bed, the house is quiet and I am reflecting upon the day. It has been a beautiful day! I could not feel more full in my heart of love and gratitude for all the loving, wonderful people we are blessed to have in our lives.

Thank you to all the family members who make our lives so rich, and thank you to our extended family of friends. In our family, we all share one gift, the ability to attract and retain amazing friends. As I look out over the landscape of our lives, as a day like today prompts me to do, I am honored and blessed by all the loving relationships in our lives. So thank you, if you read this, I count you as friend or family as well. The tapestry of our lives is woven richly with color and texture from the variety of friends and family who grace our lives.

Go forth, and give your loved ones a hug which lasts a bit longer today, a look which lingers. Tell them how much you appreciate them: be specific, be generous. These are the things which matter most in our lives. The relationships which nourish and sustain us, they make us complete.

Transitions II

I've heard so much feedback this last week about transitions. We all move through transition times many times in our lives. It seems many are in their own transitions right now, it seems to be " up" for many of us.

As part of these transition times, it seems many of us are experiencing changes with some people around us. Some of us are finding ourselves disappointed in teachers or leaders we have looked up to. Some of us are finding that we are moving on and leaving some relationships behind, or at least we are experiencing great changes in some of our relationships. How do we proceed? What are we meant to do? We might have to revise some of our relationships. It feels like we are getting reminded to follow our own hearts and Knowingness, to be our own teachers and leaders, instead of giving our power away to someone else. We are seeing our relationships with new eyes and being challenged to meet our own needs, to take care of ourselves, rather than leaning on others or having expectations of others. We are getting ourselves in a better position to hear the whispers of our own Guidance and even more prepared to be of assistance to others.

One of the goals during these times is for all of us to follow our hearts, to follow our passion. If we are putting too much importance on what someone else thinks is right for us right now, or are spending too much time squandering our energy, we are going to be reminded to take a look at this.

For me, I find the more I listen to Guidance, the more smoothly my life runs. The easier each day unfolds. The dance of giving my power away is surely present, perhaps it always will be. For me right now I find myself scrutinizing all relationships. How does this relationship make me feel? Does my heart smile when I think of that person? Well, that is a good sign, and it is pretty easy to figure out how to proceed then. The more complicated relationships for me right now are those which I feel strongly that I am meant to be in the relationship, I love the person, and yet something is changing. We are redefining, renegotiating our relationship. For some reason there is something crying out for shift and change. In these cases, it is more challenging to know how to proceed. I am flying by the seat of my pants in these areas. I don't have a model to follow, I just have to wing it, and see what happens from there. If I don't like the outcome, choose again! That is one of the great gifts of this experience. We have free will. We can choose again, and again, and again, until we get it right. When I find myself in these types of positions, wondering how to proceed, these are the most important times for me to remember the most important relationship of all. My connection to Spirit, God, Goddess, The Great Mystery, whatever works for you. These are the times when calling on Help, asking for Divine Assistance on how to proceed makes me most effective. These relationships are changing too. Trust what you get.

I look forward to hearing how these times affect you and your relationships. I am sharing this, indeed all these postings I share in the hopes that you will see a bit of yourself here. To further recognize that we all experience some similar things as part of the human condition. We are doing our best to make our way. As we work though our situations and are open about the process, then maybe as we help ourselves, we might assist another, just a little bit. It feels like that is at least part of what we are here to do together.

The Look of Love

What can you do right now, today to improve the world, to help bring world peace, to help heal our earth and her inhabitants? Sounds like a tall order to me, but the answer is small, simple, sweet. I have a simple suggestion. The Look of Love. It was a song in the 1970's, I think it was Dionne Warwick and Burt Bacharach, I could hear it playing all over our house, by my mother again and again back then. The melody is playing gently in my head right now. I don't know all the words, I just keep hearing, "The Look of Love". That is a gift. When you look at your spouse, your pet, your children, your parents, see them with the eyes of love today. Remember that we are all just doing the very best we can be doing at any given time, warts and all, but beneath it all, the current which runs within all of us is Love. That is the greatetst gift from Source, and it is a gift we can regift! We are equipped with a never ending supply of love. When we look at those we care about with The Look of Love, we are dismissing that they left their socks on the floor, we are ignoring that they left the cupboard door open, we are looking at them with the eyes of love, we are remembering and connecting to the blessing we feel that they are in our lives. The gratitude that they are sharing this journey with you right now. That they are here now. This is not something to take for granted, and yet we do so every single day, again and again. So, make the world a better place, one look at a time today. Take a moment to look at and appreciate the ones you love. The ones who are walking beside you who are sharing this journey during these difficult times. We all need to be seen with the eyes of love, to be reminded of our greatness and to be empowered by it. It is powerful soul food. Do me a favor, do one more thing, when you look in the mirror today, look at yourself with the eyes of love. Don't look at the wrinkles, or slight imperfections, look, really look into your eyes, and love yourself. You are here now for a reason, and I for one am profoundly great-ful that you are here, and that you are aware enough that you are willing to take the next opportunity to try out The Look of Love.

If you can only remember to do this once today, you are improving the world around you.

With Peace in my Soul and Love in my Heart, may you have a blessed day.

Kim

Love yourself, love one another

One of the most important aspects of my spiritual journey is the other people in my life. They are the family and friends I surround myself with on a daily, weekly, monthly basis, those are the dear ones which enrich my life tremendously, and together we enhance the journey for one another. I cherish the times I get to spend with these special people. Equally important are the ones that I have difficulty with. Those friends and family which remind me of the areas I am still working on, the friends and family I find myself challenged by interacting with. I have found for myself, many of those relationships in the past were unbalanced, and my lack of personal boundaries allowed for people in my life who were not for my highest and best, and when I began to set clear, healthy boundaries, many relationships began to shift. I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong for so many years with many of my friendships falling apart, and ending in disaster. I felt responsible and it hurt, badly. I couldn't see what I was doing wrong. I began to ask about it in prayer, and in person with others. It took some time, and a number of helpful assistants, seen and unseen to reveal that the problem was all about me, but not in the way I was thinking. Instead of being nicer, I needed to have stronger boundaries. Instead of doing more for others, I needed to be sure my friendships were in balance, and that we were both getting needs met by the time we spend together, not just one of us. In short, I knew I could do better at the friendship thing, I just didn't know how, and defining my boundaries has allowed me to do just that. For me this is friendship 101, love yourself, set healthy boundaries, to take care of yourself, thereby loving one another. Don't expect yourself to do more for someone else than you would ask for in return. If someone needs you, and the relationship is in balance, of course you are of assistance. Of course you help a friend or family member out. If someone is in need all the time, that is a different story, they may have strong needs, but it is not something our friendship can meet the needs for. In order to love them, I have to release them to their own evolution. To assist them may just be propping them up, and prolonging the agony and the inevitable journey they are due to go on for their own personal growth. We can actually hurt others, when we are "helping others"... can you say co-dependence anyone? So, defining my own boundaries has allowed me to be a more balanced person, a better partner to my husband, a better mother to my grown kids, a better daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, facilitator, whatever. All my roles and relationships were affected by the lack of boundaries on my part. Now I am able to enjoy a richness of relationship which is unparalleled in my life previously. Each relationship gets richer and deeper as time goes on. I have freed myself of time wasting relationships with people and groups, no matter how well meaning I was or they were, if they are out of balance, they are out of my immediate sphere. Oddly, they are not missed, and the rewards are great. We all have difficulities in our lives. We are here to learn and grow. I have found the more work I do, the bigger the rewards. So, love yourself, love one another, love freely and love often.

What have been your biggest lessons in relationships? Who are you currently trying to work on a relationship with, and coming up empty? I would love to hear what you have to say about this or any other topic of interest in your life, or on your path. This is how "we" do this, together. Right now, I feel like a voice in the void. Bouncing around out there. I know some of you will find me, and together we will all be better for the insights and growth we share!

Namaste,
Kim