Friday, September 30, 2011


We are the guardians of our children when they live in our home. We offer love, comfort, support, encouragement, shelter. Our daughter is away at school now. The last wee bird to leave the nest. The nest has been altered now. As have I.

I am missing my daughter but I am blessed to be connected with her on a regular basis via cell phone, texting, Facebook, email. I am no longer her guardian or her brother's guardian. It is not a bad thing, my role has changed. It is not over, it is just different.

It is a process, adjusting to not living together on a regular basis. I have had some practice, adjusting to life after our son left, but I had our daughter here to ease the transition. It was an effective buffer. With Krista gone I am adjusting to cooking less for dinner, feeding the dogs solo, watching silly television by myself (it is somehow way less fun alone). No more mother daughter fun time, lunches, pedicures or shopping for awhile. Those are the physical differences. The things I can point to. The more challenging differences are harder to quantify. Our home feels like a mouth missing a tooth. I am constantly aware of the emptiness, and my heart notices as surely as a tongue constantly drawn to the gaping hole left by the absent tooth. Our home is forever altered, as am I.

I am still a Mother, but no longer Momma, or Mommy. I find myself watching mothers with young children and wanting to remind them, "This time passes so fast, these days are precious and numbered, enjoy them. Do not take them for granted". Why do they feel so infinite at the time and so fleeting now? The empty house reverberates with the questions. Was I Mom enough? Did I hug enough, love enough, smile enough, encourage enough, empower enough, listen enough? Surely I tried, but some days life got in the way. May my children know that nothing is more important to me and to their Dad, to us, than the two of them. Ever. That remains the same.

The more things change, the more they stay the same. The constants are there, I love my children. Their father and I love them. They are the center of our nuclear family. It changes, they grow up and move forward into their lives and our circle of a nuclear family shifts to include more. We stand behind our children, instead of surrounding them. There is room for them to move ahead on their path and purpose, connected to the ones they love. We support, we nurture, we love, we comfort them. These things do not change. We are blessed.

This is a major life change. Without our children here we are redefining ourselves, our roles, our relationships. We are forever altered, as are they. The important things do not change. We love them, they love us. They are amazing human beings. Their futures are bright. Now is their time to spread their wings, to fly free, to follow their bliss. We are here for them. Always in all ways. Period. The more things change the more they stay the same. Love.

Krista, Ryan and Dakota at Krista's graduation.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

And They Called it Puppy Love....

This has been a busy end of the summer season. It seems fitting to be at the beginning of Fall and getting back to my blog.

Much has been going on. We visited our son at University for his 21st birthday. He has a new puppy. Here she is at 7 weeks.

This one is a few weeks later.

This one came in today.

Need I say more?

"...and they called it puppy love." I am smitten! We are all head over heels! She is an adorable bundle of feisty love.

Take a moment to contemplate who or what cracks your heart wide open.

Sending love to your hearts and blessings to fill your days.

With love and gratitude for all our relations.